Cue & Aye

I opened up the forum to my Facebook friends and asked that they please give me the opportunity to answer any questions they may have about Dylan's disorder, and to my surprise, I received questions about everything. Good questions, too! Questions about love, life, God, recipes, things to do in Florida, all kinds of stuff! I'm pretty excited to dig in!



I figured that I would answer them randomly, becuase that's how I do.



#1. Are you mad that Dylan has a disorder? Do you feel like he was cheated out of a "normal" life?



Wow. I actually said, "wow," outloud when I read that question. Quite simply, the answer is no on both accounts.



I am nothing short of ecstatic that I get to be his mommy. I absolutely beam every time I walk in the door and see him, same with Lylli. They are my sunshines!



I was very confused when he was first diagnoses, and very sad. That sounds like something a third grader would right, but the truth is that I had no complex emotions...I was just sad for Dylan. Sad because I knew so little about autism, and what I had seen/heard was just bad information. I was sick thinking that he would never have friends, never enjoy a date, never have the thrill of being able to enjoy music, stuck in a world that no one could get into...never love me.



That was what I had been told autism was. A disorder caused by too many vaccines which left a child a shell of their former self.



What a monstrous thing to tell the world..that every child with Autistic Spectrum Disorder is a souless, wandering person with no ability to love or feel.



After spending the next 48 hours after his diagnosis online and making appointments, I realized that ASD is as unique as the childen diagnosed.



My Dylan, our Dylan, is a beautiful and loving little angel. He needs help with his speech and with curbing his repetative behavior, and he's getting it. Not only is he recieving the help, we've seen his improve daily for the last 4-5 months.



So, am I sad? Not a bit. Dylan and his autism are intertwined, just like Lylli and her love of puppies are intertwined...just like OCD and anxiety is a part of my life.



For example, a Kelli is not a Kelli if she doesn't obsess over the food in the pantry being label out, or fuss about havign everything on her desk at 90 degree angles. It's quirky, and it gets in the way sometimes, but it's who I am. I freak out if there are too many people around me, I'll cry if I don't like the layout of a store...and that's me. I am a happy, healthy, loved and loving person and it makes no difference that I have a "disorder" of sorts. I like things neat and tidy and wish we could call "OCD" "CDO" becuase at least then it would be in alphabetical order. Yeah. Welcome to my world ;)



I love everything about Dylan, including his autism. I sincerely consider it a learning difference rather than a disorder, and I have the same expectations for him that I do for Lylli: That they enjoy life, find their soulmate, settle down, and give me grandbabies :)



As far as part two of that question, am he was cheated out of a normal life? I did in the beginning when I wasn't sure what it all meant, but now, no, I'm not worried about that at all. Besides, who wants a "normal" life? I like his quirks, other people with fall in love with his ability to hear something and hum it back immediately, or his gift of never losing his balance! Those things may be his quirks, they may be "autistic" quirks, but I know that they are what Dylan is. I love that about him.



Do we have time for another caller? I think we have time for a short one!



#2. Is Dylan harder to parent than Lylli?



Ha! HAHAHAHHAHA!! Have you MET Lylli?



Dylan listens when I tell him "no," entertains himself and plays well with others, and very rarely has a fit.



Lylli....is a fit.



Don't get me wrong, she makes my heart jump every time she says, "Mommy?" and breaks it every time she finsihes that sentence with, "Get juice," and dismissively waives her hand at me. She's hilarious and I could just eat her up she's so cute, but she is into everything in a way Dylan never was, and she has no sense of danger or fear at all.



I once heard someone say that God gives you the good child first so that you go ahead and have another one. If Lylli had been first...my tubes may have been tied before we got a chance for another one :)



They are both equally funny, sweet, smart and challenging, just in totally different ways.



And that concludes todays session. Keep asking your questions, I'm getting a kick out of answering them!



It's nice to be able to fully and competely answer the questions that I get pretty frequently without being interrupted, I really appreciate the opportunity and the interest!



Sincerely,

Kel